Humor in Life -- Bugs on the Windshield

All right, so I know it's been weeks...perhaps even months...since I've posted a Monday morning update on my life. But there have been so many fantastic books out there, I've been preoccupied with spotlighting them and interviewing the authors. But Aunt Paula reminded me it's been a while, so I got convicted. :) I know a lot of my family read this -- if you don't comment -- so here's the latest.

Today, I'm faced with no spotlight and space to fill. So, I'll do a quick recap of what's been happening in life, then get into the headline story.

We've had our condo on the market since February, but the market is so bad now, that with only 4 showings in 6 months, we had to take it off the market. We're still looking to sell it, but it seems we'll be living here for a smidgeon longer. I only pray that when God blesses us with the start of our family (and yes, we're trying for that now), I won't have to spend the latter days of my pregnancy walking up 2 flights of stairs. Otherwise, Stu might have to carry me. *winks*

In May, I attended the Colorado Christian Writer's Conference and received amazing feedback on my first book and my writing. Armed with requests from 3 editors and 2 agents, plus seeing all of the flyers for my web design business taken, I came away from that conference in Estes Park on a high that galvanized me into action. A couple of weeks later, that high deflated a bit when one of the agents told me the manuscript had to be completely edited and polished before she would look at it. With a deadline looming on July 15th, I don't have time to finish editing the rest of the manuscript, so it'll have to wait until afterward.

Colorado Christian Writer's Conference Photos (mostly scenic)

Then, in June, I took a road trip with a good friend, Jeanne (pronounced Gee-nee), to South Dakota's Black Hills to attend a CFO (Camps Farthest Out) family camp for a week. We caravanned with others she knew and what might have taken 7-1/2 hours ended up with me on the road for nearly 13 hours! But that's all right, because Jeanne and I had quite an adventure on the drive up north.

Of course, you put two women who are prone to laughter and insane antics in a car together for 8 hours and something is bound to happen!

In our case, we were driving along at a good speed, following behind the SUV with a trailer and trying hard not to lose our leader when he didn't seem to remember we were following him. He'd switch lanes, signal a little late, or decide at the last minute which direction he wanted to turn. We were left trying to figure out just where he was headed. All the while, we're chatting up a storm and listening to music on my iPod my husband bought me for our 9-month anniversary. :)

All of a sudden, we both heard a loud splat on the windshield. Keep in mind that since we're driving across eastern Colorado and western Nebraska, there isn't much to see except flat land and a few hills. The road and land stretched out for miles. This means, there's nothing to stop the bugs in the air from smacking against the windshield. It's a normal sound that you get used to hearing, even though you cringe when one makes a bit more of a mess than you might prefer, or flipping the switch for windshield wiper fluid and the wipers only makes the matter worse.

When this loud splat occurred, Jeanne squirmed in her seat. She kept making "eww, eww" sounds and pointing at the windshield. So, I did what any normal driver would do. I flipped the switch for the wipers to go. That only made Jeanne's reaction worse! And because I had to keep my eyes on the road -- even if I'd only drive off into a bunch of ranchland if I left the road -- I couldn't see what she was seeing. I also have a dreamcatcher hanging from my rearview mirror, so a small area of my windshield is blocked.

And yep...you guessed it. That spot was exactly where this "bug" had chosen for his splatted resting place.

So, amidst me attempting to keep my eye on the lead car in front of us, I was distracted by Jeanne's squirming and pointing, and when I had flipped the switch, I finally caught sight of the "bug" that had hit the windshield. This thing wasn't really a bug.

It was a flying grasshopper! And a BIG one at that!

Needless to say, at the speed we were going, it made quite a mess. And if that wasn't enough, it managed to lodge its wing underneath the right wiper so when I tried to swish it off my windshield, it would just go with the wiper and smear a rounded path across that side of the windshield. No wonder why Jeanne was squirming in her seat!

Well, being the adventurous gal that she is, Jeanne offered to roll down the window and grab hold of the wiper to lift it and see if the grasshopper would dislodge itself and fly back over the top of the car. Keep in mind, this is a woman who hates bugs of any kind. So, to see her willing to do this was quite a feat. I told her to go ahead with a raised eyebrow as I warily alternated between watching her movements and keeping another eye on the road ahead.

With painstaking slowness, she reached out the window and grabbed the wiper with her forefinger and thumb to raise it from the windshield. The grasshopper clung to it. So, she snapped it down. After a moment or two, she tried again, only this time, something happened...

The grasshopper moved---toward HER!

It started to slide toward her side of the car, which made her squeal and snap the wiper down again as she snatched her arm back inside the car and rolled up the window. I was praying all this time that the movement would dislodge the thing, but it didn't. When I saw it move thanks to Jeanne's assistance, I thought we might finally have some success. Turning toward her with a hesitant but amused look on my face, I asked if she thought I should hit the switch for the wipers and fluid again.

We both waited a moment or two before deciding. After all, we didn't want to get the thing stuck worse...again. Keep in mind, that this escapade also had us almost doubled over in laughter. As it had been almost 8 hours since I had left that morning, added to getting up at 5:30am, let's say I was a little punchy and a lot road-weary. But back to the story. I decided it was worth the risk, so I reached for the signal arm and pulled it toward me to squirt the fluid as the automatic wipers went into motion.

Jeanne and I sat there and prayed as we watch the grasshopper stay put on the windshield, dislodged from the wipers, and with a final swish, it went whoosh over the top of the car and gone somewhere behind us. With the "crisis" averted and the open road once again ahead of us, we dissolved in a fit of laughter. Let's just say it's a good thing no one was relying on US to lead the caravan or was driving next to us during this entire ordeal. We might have been reported to the county sheriff for drunk or disorderly driving. :)

I wish I had some pictures to share, but somehow I doubt Jeanne would have taken one. *g*

The fun doesn't stop there, though. With that behind us, we came upon what I now know as a Wind Farm. The tall structures that looked like technologically-advanced windmills loomed into the sky to our left. I just had to stop and take a few pictures. And since the road went on for miles in front of us, I figured a few moments wouldn't hurt us. We'd catch up to the car in front of us in no time. As I was snapping pictures, Jeanne remarked about whether or not the lead car even knew we weren't behind them anymore. We had exchanged cell phone #'s at the rest stop, but nothing but silence came from our end. I wasn't concerned, but it did confirm the lack of notice the lead car had regarding our status.

When we were on the road again and cresting a small hill, we saw the SUV and trailer up ahead. And that's when the phone rang. I laughed, picked it up to answer and assured them we were still behind them. They said they were driving along and all of a sudden noticed we weren't there. Then, they wondered how long we'd been gone, and I couldn't help but laugh. When I relayed this to Jeanne, she shook her head. It seems we needed to be on our guard and plot out our own route in case we got separated, because it might be awhile before that car ahead noticed us. :)

Well, we had many more adventures over the course of the next week, but there are far too many to name. Our time at the camp included a symphony of snoring from everyone in the cabin (except me, of course, who wonders how folks can snore and not wake themselves up), amusing drama experiences, fantastic worship, great speakers, delicious food, and amazing scenery. It also included a visit to Mt. Rushmore (my first!) and the tourist trap of Keystone. I even managed to get 2 chapters written on my deadline novel coming up in July. On the return drive, we headed west into Wyoming so I could mark one more state off my list as being visited, and Jeanne slept from north of Cheyenne into Colorado. By the time I arrived home, it was 8pm and we'd left around 9am that morning. But it also included taking Jeanne all the way home and winding the back way across the Continental Divide and Front Range to re-enter Colorado Springs.

South Dakota Road Trip Photos

Hubby was glad to have me home, and I was glad to be home. The week following was fairly uneventful, and last week, I joined my sister-in-law, niece and nephew, cousin and her 2 children for a visit to the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo. What a great way to spend the afternoon. Here are some pictures for you to enjoy:

Cheyenne Mountain Zoo Photos

That's about all for now. I'll be back next week with whatever other funny escapades happen to me this week. Who knows what kind of trouble I can find! :)

Humor in Life -- conference experiences

This past weekend, I attended the Colorado Christian Writer's Conference. Before I get into the funny aspects, I had a fantastic time with 3 requests from 2 agents and 1 magazine editor and interest from 2 other book editors. That, plus discovering that all of my web design fliers and brochures were taken and I sold ALL TWELVE of my books that I consigned with the bookstore...and it turned out to be a promising experience.

Obviously, these events also allow you to re-connect with friends and meet some new ones. Several of us from ACFW spent time together at various opportunities and roped in other fiction writers or authors to join as soon as they could. Don't worry, we didn't use brute force or blackmail or any other form of threats...although that has been known to be done. :)

Some of the other memorable moments were:

• watching 3 teams of 2 volunteers unravel toilet paper rolls as fast as they could while a team of 3 teenage guys used a rigged leaf blower with a paint roller attached to the end where the TP tube was hung and blew out the roll right over top of the conference attendees in the audience.
• trying to catch Bill (bookstore volunteer) before he changed one of his wacky ties, so I could get the upper hand on his goofy wardrobe combinations.
• walking through the cafeteria line and looking at the food available, trying to identify it as something other than science projects or unknown substances; once in a while the food was labeled on the buffet line, but not often.
• going to the drink dispenser and having ice shoot out with a light touch of the trigger.
  trying to place trays in the moving conveyor before it disappeared behind the window and all contents of the tray were upended on the floor.
• doing everything possible to avoid a collision with kids in the cafeteria who were zooming in and among other diners and looking to break land-speed records as they grabbed their trays to snatch a table, wolf down their food and race to the tray deposit conveyor area.
• attempting to find a table to eat meals while surrounded by hundreds of young people and kids staying at the YMCA where the conference was held, and then meandering through a maze of tables to get drinks, condiments and other supplies after which the return to the table became a feat of extraordinary ability!
• doing a dance on stage with a tablecloth under my feet as I cleaned up spilled coffee in preparation for a performer who would be dancing during the closing service.
• driving all the way up a dirt and pothole-filled road to what looked like an abandoned cabin and depositing Kim's belongings there only to find out that she had been given a key to the wrong cabin, and that the entire area was closed, so we had to drive all the way up there and retrieve her belongings then transport and unload them in the *right* cabin -- only Kim would have this happen!
• watching Darcie roll on the floor in the bookstore for a reason that escapes me at the moment.
• driving home and following another car, where the driver swerved a bit and then turned into a strip mall area after seeing "Outback" and thinking it was the steakhouse only to discover it was a saloon!
• swapping places with that car so we were in the lead and looking for a place to eat dinner, arguing over whether the state of Delaware was in the Mid-Atlantic region or New England, then spotting Olive Garden and turning, only to see a mall on the other side of the road just as we turned, which led us to change direction and get over to that side...all with the other car following us!

And the # 1 funniest moment by far was helping a friend with her luggage getting loaded into her car, setting down her rolling "briefcase" to rearrange what was in the back and then being told that piece was rolling away. I turned to see the organizer just strolling on down the dirt area into the slightly paved gravel area and headed right for another car. My friend couldn't chase after it, so I did, commanding it to stop rolling and stay right where it was. Of course, it didn't listen. But, I managed to snatch it before it hit the car and drag it back up the hill where I placed it in the back seat.

So much more happened, but it was all conference-related stuff. I might save that for later, or stick with this funny-flavored post and leave it at that.

Regardless, it was a great time. Now, back to the grind of work.

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Humor in Life -- Science Fiction and Fantasy

On Saturday, my husband and I met a few friends and drove up to Denver to attend one day of StarFest 2008. This was my first one, but my dh and his friends have been attending this for a few years. They 'lovingly' refer to it as "Geek Fest." When my hubby said I had to go...if for no other reason than to see how *non*-Geek he is, I figured it'd be worth it for that. :)

Of course, I'm a quasi sci-fi chic anyway. But let me tell you. If I had any doubts whatsoever about my husband's level of geekness, they were all obliterated and blown to smithereens from the moment we set foot inside the hotel. We had arranged to meet the other group who had driven in the second car in the atrium area near the hotel's cafe. So, after purchasing our tickets and attaching our ribbons as proof of registration, we headed in that direction--encountering Storm Troopers, Pirates, Star Trek and Enterprise fleet members, StarGate teams and bar wenches along the way.

As soon as we entered the atrium, the 5 stories of balconies which flanked the atrium on 3 sides immediately caught my eye. My husband had told me (and one of his coworkers who was also attending for the first time) of these, but you just have to see it to believe it. Some folks went all out to decorate the balconies of their hotel rooms. Many who attend the entire StarFest weekend register early and request these rooms with the express purpose of having something in store for the decoration. Of course, there is a prize awards Saturday night for the room with the best balcony decoration. So, perhaps it's worthwhile. They certainly were a sight to behold.

Once all 6 of us were together, we wandered around (waiting for things to get started at 10am), checking out the art room where artwork, sculptures, models, clay figures, paintings, photos and much more were on display and for sale or auction bidding. We moved from there to the "toy" room as this group calls it, where collectibles, movie posters, DVDs, VHS tapes, CD's, action figures, decorative plates, swords, light sabers, and everything else was available for sale. Both of these rooms were jam-packed with booths, vendors and displays. And some of this stuff...well, it would make kindergarten artwork look like masterpieces.

More booths and vendors lined the hallways and main traffic areas, hawking books, munchies, autographed photos, movie promotions, event announcements and much more. There was even a booth called "The Brig" where you could pay to have someone from the event thrown in there amidst a lot of fanfare. I joked about "nominating" a member of *our* group, but it never happened. The rest of the morning passed with what I would call a "snooze fest" main event, in which a computer graphics and CGI designer took 2 hours to present the history of computer animation. It didn't get interesting until the final 20 minutes when he used the example of the "Rock Monster" from Galaxy Quest to show what computers can do.

After this, we headed to lunch, looking for a Hawaiian Barbecue restaurant that one guy in our group said was close to the hotel. After walking for fifteen minutes and checking out the nearby eateries, we gave up and ate at the Chicken Kitchen. Decent food, but nothing compared to what I'm sure we would have sampled at the barbecue place. I tell ya, that's the list time we trust Nathan to lead us anywhere. At least the food was filling, and the walk was a good bit of exercise, as we had to walk back afterward. Although, I think I would have preferred to travel like R2D2 did. :)

The afternoon passed with panels featuring the key celebrity attendees -- Masi Oka (known for his role of Hiro on the TV show Heroes and now in his upcoming role in the film, Speed Racer) Anne Lockhart (who is primarily known for her work as Sheba on the original Battlestar Galactica); Adam Baldwin (who is known for his portrayal of Jayne from the short-lived but much-loved show, Firefly, as well as The Patriot and Independence Day and Serenity), and Zachary Quinto (known for his role as Sylar on Heroes as well as his upcoming portrayal of Spock in the new Star Trek movie releasing in 2009).

Other guests included authors (Dave McDonnell, Kevin Dilmore, Steven Fawcette, Christie Golden, Dayton Ward), artists (Ed Cramer, Jason and Heather Martin), other actors (Cliff Simon, Nate Torrence, Nana Visitor, Nichelle Nichols), and the master of ceremonies (Kevin Atkins), but they didn't have a main event Q&A session. Only their autograph booths and smaller venue presentations.

My favorite part, though, was getting the chance during the Trailer Park feature to slip out and chat with Anne Lockhart for about 15 minutes. She was sitting at her autograph booth but no one was there, so I walked on up and started a conversation. First, we chatted about the fact that she got her role on Battlestar Galactica when Jane Seymour (who played Serena in the pilot and first episode) didn't want to accept the full-time part. When I mentioned that I work with Jane on her web site and with fanmail, Anne said she starred with Jane in a 2-part episode of Dr. Quinn. It was one of my favorites from that TV show of Jane's, and I could feel my face warm as a blush crept into my cheeks when I didn't remember her playing that role. She forgave me, though, and we continued talking about TV today compared to what it used to be, as well as her upcoming work and life in Hollywood for a female actress with a career spanning over 30 years. She asked me to say "hello" to Jane for her, so I will be sure to do that at the first opportunity.

I managed to slip into the Trailer Park near the end in time to see the new trailers for Indiana Jones, Get Smart, Hellboy 2, Narnia: Prince Caspian, and many others I don't remember right now. Looks like this summer will be a good one! There was a short break followed by the Parody Play which combined several little skits in which combinations of well-known lines or spoofs are assembled to hopefully produce laughter. But, the set designs were rudimentary, the dialogue and banter were probably closer to third-rate, and their lapel microphones weren't fastened in the right places, lending to a production where we heard every other word and had to fill in the blanks on our own. Somehow, I believe our interpretations were better than what was on stage. :) Past years are said to have been better, but this year? It didn't seem to be a hit.

Finally, at 8pm, we come to the final main event -- Costume Parade. Here is where anyone who wishes to enter is involved in a parade of costumes in several categories: children, teen, fantasy/online gaming/sci-fi/other, and group. An overall category entitled "Best of Show" is awarded at the end. Last year, a group dressed as the cast from Space Balls, and when they didn't win the group category, a riot almost broke out. That was when the "best of show" category was created. It was back again this year, with fantastic results. By far, the best was a human Gundham character (entire suit hand-made) and the cast from Night at the Museum. They were both awarded "best of show" in a tie. The group might be the same as the Space Balls bunch from last year, and there were rumors or this group's connection to theatre with their intricate and amazing costumes, but nothing was confirmed.

However, it was the Lego Storm Troopers who stole the show. LOL!

After this, we headed with the masses for the exit and made our way to our cars, agreeing to meet at a Village Inn along the interstate, where we spent the next hour-and-a-half eating a near-midnight "snack" and rehashing the day's events. Despite assuring the waitress we had consumed absolutely NO alcohol, our laughter and silly antics were suspect during the entire time we were there.

Stu and I arrived home around 1am and barely managed to dump our things before falling into bed for much-needed sleep. I'm already thinking about what costume I can wear next year, and what I might be able to wrangle Stu into donning, but we both agreed we'd borrow our 6-year-old niece and dress her up as Pikachu. She'd steal the show!

Humor in Life -- Marital Communication and Raining Dip 'n' Dots

I'm a little late with this, but I'm glad. But I'll get to that after the first point.

Last year on this blog, I tracked the progress of my wedding plans. After getting engaged. I shared a special multimedia announcement my then-fiance and I created together to share the joy with others. And then came the wedding and the start of our marriage. So many people gave us helpful advice, and a lot of it fell into similar categories of how to avoid problems, how to resolve conflicts and how to stay happy in a marriage.

But one tip rang out loud and clear -- the importance of communication.

I can't tell you how often I meet a married couple and find myself amazed at their ability predict what the other one will say or anticipate each other's moves/actions/needs. People tell you that an earmark of a good relationship is when the two involved finish each other's sentences and talk without words.

Well, ESP, mind-reading and clairvoyance don't come with the ring.

In fact, it takes time and work to make it happen. Case and point. My car was having issues and had recently been serviced. But a week later, it was doing the same thing and I'd called the shop to have them look at it again. I was on my way toward taking it back. Only this time, the car would rev and not turn over. So, hubby had to come home from work and rescue me. I had gotten the car started but stopped to check the mail and got stuck in front of the mailboxes right at the entrance to our condo community.

It wouldn't start, so we had to push it. Well, I got in the driver's seat and he pushed. One problem. He wasn't talking to me as we moved it. So, I didn't know when and where he wanted me to steer. We were going in reverse so I was looking over my shoulder. I knew not to hit the brake but I also didn't want to hit anything, so when steering if we were getting close and I couldn't avoid it, I'd hit the break. We got to a point where we were trying to get it into a parking space and we were going to hit the car next to us. So, I hit the brakes and hubby got mad.

First, he asked me why I didn't steer. Then, he asked why I hit the brakes. Not long after that, he said "you're the driver." I knew that time wasn't the right time to jest, so I waited until he had cooled off to point out to him if he wanted me to go a certain way or do something, he needed to TELL me, not just think it. It took a little persuasion, but he eventually realized the folly in this experience. We both apologized for not thinking out the situation beforehand and made a pact to make sure we talked it out if it happened in the future.

Yeah, ESP doesn't come naturally. :)

Now, today, a few months later, we've gotten much better. Still have a long way to go, but it's a fun ride. Today, I joined hubby and our real estate agents for lunch. Without asking, he provided bread without me asking and second-guessed drink needs. He also seems to know when I could use a hug or loving touch.

We drove separate cars, so we left and headed in opposite directions...and I ran smack into blowing snow that turned into light hail. But this wasn't your standard-issue typical hail. This was soft, and resembled rain in how it fell, but it was solid enough to land with a soft thud on the car and the road. It accumulated on the windshield and gathered like ice pellets, but the pinging wasn't hard like ice. Added to that was getting closer to home and seeing blue skies with white, puffy clouds compared to the gray, overcast where the snow, rain and hail were. When hubby got home, he asked if I liked the weather. I told him, I loved it:

"It was raining Dip 'n' Dots!"

Humor in Life -- grapefruit and in-laws

It's that time again...when I make some attempt at turning everyday experiences into laughter-filled moments. I confess, it's not always easy, but I have to turn on my funnybone ears and don my funnybone glasses to listen or view life through a funny-filter.

This morning, my husband decided to have a grapefruit we'd received care of our nephew, but it came from Stu's grandparents in Arizona. Some of his family visited them over Easter vacation and came back with fresh fruit from their orchard trees. Now, I don't know how many of you out there actually like grapefruit, but the only way I'll take it is if it's mixed with other fruit juices in a drink. I'm not even sure how they can call this thing a fruit, when it's certainly not sweet by any stretch of the imagination...or at least not sweet to me.

So, Stu sliced open the fruit and made a remark about how grapefruit got its name. He said something about folks heralding that it was a "great fruit" and then someone along the way misheard it and started calling it grapefruit. Then, he took a bite.

Shoo-wee! You should have seen his face. He smacked his lips a few times and swallowed. I looked over my shoulder in time to hear him say:

"It has definite pucker value."

And from the looks of things, I'd say I have to agree with him. :)

Ok, now for the in-laws. Almost all of us have them, and some of us are fortunate enough to get along with them most of the time. That's the case with me. Thus far, I haven't had any complaints about my relatively new in-laws. But then again, I'm a people person, so meeting new folks is easy for me. I tend to get along with just about everyone...even the weird ones.

Well, yesterday after church, Stu and I were in the car and talking about how we wanted nothing more than to go home and get away from 7-years olds for a while. We co-teach the 2nd grade Sunday School class, and that morning, we had 20 of them running around because the lesson didn't allow enough time at the end to keep them structured. We also had one of our teachers leave because she wasnt' feeling well, and Stu and I staggered our absence to give blood during a blood drive. Consistency is important, and when the teachers are floating in and out, the kids take advantage.

So, we're about halfway home when Stu's phone rings and it's his cousin, Debbie. She's about to meet her parents at a Subway not far from Stu's sister's house. She wants to know if we'd like to join the family at Shauna's. I tell her we'll see them there. Then, we pull up in front of a Walgreens so I can pick up a prescription. While I'm inside, Stu calls his sister to see if it's all right that we bring Roxie and put her in the back yard. Then, Debbie calls back to say everyone's there and ready to eat.

We rush home, grab the dog, swap cars and head to Shauna's. About 2 miles from her house, the phone rings again. Since I'm driving this time, Stu answers. I don't know who's on the other end of the line, but I hear him ask about the Subway and say that we didn't know we were supposed to meet there. He confirms the location, hangs up and turns to tell me that we need to go to the Subway. We're eating there then coming to Shauna's.

Ok, now we make a quick stop at Shauna's to drop off Roxie and head to the Subway. When we pull into the parking lot, the family gets out of their cars and heads toward the shop. We all exchange hellos and greetings, and once we step inside, Stu's mother remarks about all the phone calls and asked if we liked it. I smiled and just told them they need to get their act together, to which they said they thought they had....until they started calling to invite everyone.

Despite how much fun my new extended family is, I have to admit to joking about moving to the "West" and gaining a family of "outlaws" -- Wanted poster and all. *grins*

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Humor in Life -- Whitewater Rafting, Dogs and Recliner Chairs...oh my!

For today's author spotlight, you'll find it below this post. I didn't want to skip out on my new goal for sharing some lighthearted stories to brighten your day. Last year at this time, I was posting weekly updates on the countdown to my wedding. Now that the craziness and hectic planning period is passed, you get the privilege of a glimpse into REAL life with me.

So, fasten your seatbelts. It's sure to be a bumpy ride!

Last week, I again spent time at Kim Woodhouse's home. Our typical "lunch" turned into an all-day affair, but the highlight by far, was watching Kim struggle with her recliner chair in the living room. She swears the thing's possessed and has it in for her. After seeing her try to get out of the thing, I'm inclined to believe her.

Quite easily, she kicks back and extends the footrest to relax and work on emails and other things on her laptop. But before long, it's time to move on to something else. So, she scoots forward and attempts to kick the footrest back in place, which will set the recliner upright again and allow her to stand.

Unfortunately, that's not to be for Kim. As I'm sure you've noticed, life tends to be a bit more complicated for her, and this recliner apparently knows it! It's not going to miss a chance to have its share of the pie, so it makes the footrest nigh onto impossible to go back in place. You can imagine the view at seeing someone sitting down and trying to kick a footrest back so that it clicks. If she tries to straddle the piece and get up, the chair reclines again and throws her back against the cushions, trapping her in its menacing clutches.

Finally, spent and exhausted from her own attempts, she frantically calls to her daughter, Kayla, to come and rescue her poor mother from the grasp of the evil recliner. Sweet Kayla comes, with a smile on her face and waits for Kim to lift her legs high in the air. Again, quite a comical sight. Kayla proceeds to plop onto the floor in front of the chair, brace herself and place her feet against the footrest. With a solid shove, the footrest clicks into place and Kim is free!

Thanks, Kayla!

And that's not all. If you've managed to catch your breath or scrunch your cheeks back into place after laughing at the above image, here's another one for you.

This past weekend, my husband and our puppy, Roxie, went down to my husband's parents' place for Easter. Once leaving the overcast and snowy Colorado Springs, the blue skies appeared and it turned out to be a beautiful day. So, we decided to drive a little further and snap some pictures of the snow-capped Sangre de Cristo mountains in the Wetmoor Valley. Along the way, we opened the windows in the back seat for Roxie so she could get a good whiff of the smells and fresh air down that way.

Well, we also recently learned that she's a Border Collie/Black Lab mix. As such, she has an instinctive "herding" nature in her that comes out full force when she's on a walk or in the car. It's commonplace to see a dog with its head out the window of a moving car. But, I don't know if you've often had the occasion to witness a dog's head whipping from the front to the back of the open window as a car passes going the opposite way. It's almost as if the wind catches hold of her head and decides to carry her head with it.

But, it's actually Roxie wanted to "herd" the cars that are getting past her. She doesn't want to let a single one of them get away, so she tries her hardest to get them back in place. It's a good thing we only allow enough room for her head. Otherwise, she'd no doubt be out that window in a flash. Viewing this from the front seat is quite the amusement, I assure you.

The final part of our drive had my husband listing off all the things he wants me to do this summer. Camping, fishing, hiking, and lots of outdoor things. All of that sounds good to me. But there is one thing that I'm not sure I can manage.

Whitewater Rafting!

Yes, that's right. My husband wants me to get into a large cylindrical rubber tube with paddles/oars on the side and foot braces along the bottom, then shove off from solid land into the menacing waters of the Arkansas River. Now, back East this wouldn't be much of an issue, as the rivers are mostly wide and somewhat lazy...at least where I've canoed and tubed. But, out here? They're narrow and fast! Those two combinations just don't sound all that appealing to me.

Picture it with me. This open-topped and open-sided tube is bouncing and rushing along the choppy waters and glancing off of rocks in the riverbed, all the while being piloted by the rest of the passengers (me included!) with commands from the raft leader to paddle a certain way when we encounter a rock or particularly fast-moving rapids.

I can see it now. I'm sitting, feet firmly hooked under the braces to keep my bottom glued to the seat, oar in hand and witnessing the oncoming crash of water that's about to swallow us whole! Then, I hear the shout of the raft leader to paddle more to the left, then to the right, then backpaddle to slow us down. I wish he'd make up his mind! All the while, I'm frantically attempting to keep my feet secure and my bottom glued, because at any moment, I'm going to go projectile into the raging waters, pulled beneath the torrent and left behind by the rest of the raft members.

And so ends the tale of that poor gal who just couldn't keep her seat....

Umm...yeah. I don't think so!

Humor in Life -- Shopping and Web Sites

Top o' the Mornin' to Ya! And a fine mornin' 'tis too. Not much green to be seen 'round here, but sure'n we got plenty of the white powdery coating outside. 'Tis a beautiful blue sky day with a wee bit of fluffy clouds over the mountains. Mind ya don't go dancin' an Irish jig without a wee leprechaun by your side. Me best wishes that ye be findin' that pot o' gold ye be wantin' and best of luck to ya!

Ok, so I posted last week about my new search to discover the humor in life. And I also shared about the friend who inspired this. So, it only seems fitting that time spent with her is what led to today's reports of the humor from this past week.

First, this past Friday, we went to Best Buy to return an item she'd purchased that ended up not being what she needed. Within seconds of walking in the door, our little venture started out with laughter.

Kim asked the salesperson standing near the front where we needed to go for straight returns. Without missing a beat, he looked at me, then back at Kim and said, "She looks fine to me, why would you want to return her?"

I have to admit that never in my life have I had a salesperson say that to me or about me. What a hoot! Kim and I looked at each other and shared a laugh, then as we made our way to the returns lane, we both agreed that would be the first item to make it into my humor post.

The second happened later that same day. I was at Kim's working on her web site and discovered some of the HTML coding was incomplete. So, we worked together to fix that and when it was all done, she joyfully announced that...

"I have meta tags!"

Her husband walked by, and she told him too, then asked him if he knew what those were. He looked at her and said, "Do you need medication or pills for them?"

Talk about quick wit and a strong connection to the funny bone! LOL! Kim and I both lapsed into giggles and laughter at that one. Again, we agreed that it was classic enough and perfect for this post.

Btw, for those who don't know, 'meta tags' are HTML coding in the header of a web page that tells search engines how to catalogue a web site so when browsers type in keywords, the sites are ranked according to the tags.

And there you have it. My humor moments from this past week. I'll be spending TWO days with Kim this week and one with my critique group. Who knows what can happen between now and next Monday.

Stay tuned!

Humor in Life / Why Men Are Happier than Women!

All right. I admit it. In my spare time lately, I've been spending time with a celebrity (and she'll likely scold me for this). She's a great lady, with lots of class, and people recognize her everywhere she goes. But she's not your typical celebrity. She actually speaks to 'normal' people and makes it her life mission to be a blessing to others in any way she can. Her name is Kimberley Woodhouse ('Kim' to most) and her family was a recent recipient of a brand new home courtesy of Extreme Makeover and ABC.

But there is more to her than the notoriety of a TV show--far too much for this post. So, I'll snip it a bit and say that thanks to my friendship with her, I'm rediscovering my funny bone. I think I shoved it to some unmentionable place, bogged down by the responsibilities of life. Not anymore, though.

I mentioned Kim's life mission. Well, a lot of that mission is accomplished through humor. She has a fantastic way of seeing the fun in life, and after spending just a few hours with her, you're usually good for at least two weeks of seeing the laughter moments in your own life. You'd be amazed at what you see when you're looking at life through funny-bone-colored glasses. :)

So, I've now made it MY mission to rediscover my funny bone and do my part in bringing a little light and fun to others. At least, I'll try. Look out Colorado Springs!

Of course, I might just fail miserably because I'm too practical and serious for this to work. But I'm willing to give it a shot.

Now, let's take a trip down the lane that draws the line between men and women and why men often find it easier to laugh than women do:

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A friend and fellow author had this on her blog just before Christmas, and I found it too true not to share . . .

Men Are Just Happier People — what do you expect from such simple creatures?

• Your last name stays put.
• The garage is all yours.
• Chocolate is just another snack.
• You can be President.
• You can never be pregnant.
• You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park or you donʼt have to wear any shirt at all.
• Car mechanics tell YOU the truth.
• The world is your urinal.
• You never have to drive to another gas station because the restroom was just too icky.
• You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
• Same work, more pay.
• Wrinkles add character.
• People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
• New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
• One mood all the time.
• Wedding dress: $5000; tux rental: $100; wedding plans taking care of themselves: PRICELESS
• Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
• You know stuff about tanks.
• A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
• You can open all your own jars.
• You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
• If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
• Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
• Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
• You almost never have strap problems in public.
• You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
• Everything on your face stays its original color.
• The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
• You only have to shave your face and neck.
• You can play with toys all your life.
• One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons.
• You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
• You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
• You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
• You can do your gift shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 23 minutes.

No wonder men are happier creatures!

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And thus ends today's quest for finding more humor in my life so that I might bring a smile to your face--or maybe just a grin--or actually just a twitch to your lips--or perhaps....oh nevermind. Just stay tuned for next week and more.

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